I don’t understand what is it about me smoking a cigarette on the balcony and doing my best not to attract attention that makes people talk to me. I have no clue what they are saying so I apply my policy: I just smile and say JA! If they are making eye contact for a long time then I will nod several times to make that JA sound even stronger, as if I know what the hell I am talking about. Even if I have been taking this dutch language course for a while now, when they are shouting from the other side of the street I am completely clueless whether they are talking about the weather or about playboy bunnies. One of these days I would really really love to know what these people have been saying to me all this time.
But this policy has bitten me in the ass several times. Not once was I at a shop, any shop, and they were asking me for an ID or for my adress and I was grinning like an idiot and saying JA! And the poor people were looking at me waiting, I was smiling, they were waiting…I was smiling. They were saying it again…I was saying JA. Eventually I would understand that something isn’t quite right so I would give them big innocent eyes and say, in dutch: “Oh sorry, my dutch is not so good. Can you say that in english?”. At that point in the game most of the people had already decided that I am missing some vital parts of the brain so trying to save my pride was useless.
I came to terms with the fact that all the cashiers from the nearby supermarket think I am slow in the head and to be honest I kinda like the special treatment.:D
P.S. Please note the handicap sign above my head. Says it all.
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